It's my first post here...

I'm 16 year old girl from Finland. I'm not able to go to school at the moment.
I've been self-harming myself since third grade. I didn't cut, but I strangled myself and hitted myself.
Last autumn was the first time I touched sharp objects in order to hurt myself. After a bad day at school I was so tired, so numb, so distressed. I didn't think about it, I just took the nearest sharp thing, which happened to be scissors, and sliced my arm. Then again, and again. I stopped crying, it was like magic. It did hurt, but it stopped my crying.
After that I used the very same scissors for three different times atleast. It didn't cut very deep. They were cheap scissors. But it was all good. The scars healed fast.

But yesterday I couldn't help it. I just had to do something. I tried the scissors but it didn't work anymore. I remembered that I have art-knife. (it looks a bit like scalpel, and is very sharp. I used it to cut open birds before)
I used the knife. It worked so much better than the scissors. It felt so good. But at the same time I wish I didn't need this. I have to stop before someone notices, or something way worse happens.

But why it's the only way to get back on earth again? Why it's so addicting?

At the same time I want to do it more, but at the same time I want to stop. I just can't.

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Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm?

We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in the study takes only 90 minutes, and you will be entered into a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. If you are interested, please email us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.

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THE DETAILS:

Background Information: Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do: If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate: We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

What’s in it for you: Participants who complete the questionnaires will be entered in a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information: This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.


Please contact us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6

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